I Said Hello to Gray

October 2022, I did a thing. I made a decision, a very hard decision; I decided that it was time for me to surrender to time, and let my gray come through. So at my regularly scheduled hair appointment to wash that gray away, I told my hair dresser to cut it so that I can gray out. She did.

Unfortunately, after my hair appointment, I was to attend a family funeral. I say unfortunately because when my hairdresser was done, I did not like who I saw in the mirror. I couldn’t tell my hairdresser anything, not “I love it” or “good job”. When I arrived home, my husband’s response was “so you did it.” He thought it was okay. I told him that immediately after the funeral I want to go to the wig shop because I hated it!!!!!

It was all white in the back except the nape of my neck which was all black. It was cut shorter than I wanted. There was no disguising this! The wig shops no longer allow you to try on wigs. I actually thought about buying some more hair dye, but was talked down by a close friend. But still I was perplexed with how I am going to make this work!

For a while, I tried to soften the shock with a root touch up pen and/or powder. I had to do something! I couldn’t go to church like this. It was out in the open. There was no hiding it. My gray hair was like “bang, here I am”!

Of course, when I got to church, I had some compliments, but I was just not comfortable in my skin anymore. I was used to how I used to look, so was my sister. This is vanity at its root. I was reminded of a scripture in Ecclesiastes 12:1-8, that speaks about aging, giving a warning to remember our Creator while we are young, before the “almond blossoms”.

Well, my almond tree blossomed a long time ago, but I kept washing it away. Why? Why are we, more pointedly me, so fixated on how I look? Solomon said it.

Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher; all is vanity.

Ecclesiastes 12:8

I am merely experiencing life! My life is like a flower that fades, or a vapor that soon vanishes. God planned it that way. What is the matter that I cannot Embrace the Hoary Head? The Bible speaks of it as a great thing.

The hoary head is a crown of glory, If it be found in the way of righteousness.

Proverbs 16:31

I knew I had to get to a new mindset about this, so I prayed. I begged God to help me to accept this new me because I did not like it at all. I needed God to give me a new mindset. Other women may not have had this difficulty, but I most certainly did, so I needed the power of God for a mindset change.

Guess what? God answered my prayer. A couple of days before Christmas, before I washed my hair, I combed my hair all back and stared at myself in the mirror to adjust to the new me or the me I had refused to accept. I put on lipstick and stared. I was okay! I didn’t hate it. God was working on me!!!! He heard my feeble prayer even though it was all about vanity.

That Sunday, Christmas morning, I was not going to soften the gray with root touch up, even though I had ordered a new Madison touch up compact. I was going to surrender to time, and I did. I know that I could not have done this without God giving me a new mindset, a new perspective. So I truly thank him. Yes, I went through a whole lot of whining and manipulations to get here, but I got here, thanks be to a faithful God.


16 thoughts on “I Said Hello to Gray

  1. I really like this pic of you. The cut looks nice. You did shock me when I first saw you grey. Never thought you would. It’s a blessing to be able to show all the years of God’s grace and blessings towards us by letting our grey fly.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Barbara love it! Like you I had a hard time embracing my gray hair. Wondering if it made me look older. Now I’m loving my silver “crown of glory”. Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Love it Barbara! Like you it took me a minute to embrace my new look. Wondering if the gray hair made me look older. Now, I’m actually loving my “crown of glory”. Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You are beautiful ❤️ I had been having my hair highlighted for many years. When I finally gave in to let it all go white, I was surprised that difference wasn’t much different than what it was when I spent a fortune to camouflage it.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You’re so radiantly beautiful, Barbara! I can totally relate to this excellent article you’ve shared here. When I was going through my “withdrawal from hair color,” I remember Frankie’s main encouragement and admonishment: “You look good to me, Babe! Don’t let anybody tell you what you should look like!” Wisdom cries at the gates for life’s truth from the Hoary Heads!! Blessings…

    Liked by 1 person

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